I want to scream at the top of my lungs. I want to punch every wall, kick every door.
I want to have a purpose, have some form of validation.
I want to exist. I want a reason to live.
I don’t want to be this invisible loner, lying here decaying.
I want my energy back, my spark.
I want to smile again, laugh until it hurts but still can’t stop.
I don’t want to be trapped here anymore. Stuck with my own thoughts as company; my captive and torturer.
I want this dull pain to stop. I want to rip it out of me. I want to throw it around, beat on it the same way it beats on me. I want to show it that I’m the one in control now.
I want to be me again.